~~ Welcome to My World ~~
Welcome to my home page!! Check out some of my favorite links: Alzheimer's Assoc. Tourette's Syndrome Assoc Susan G. Koman Welcome to My Pages
 (A favorite of mine)
Into My Own
One of my wishes is that those dark trees,
So old and firm they scarcely show the breeze, Were not, as 'twere, the merest mask of gloom, But stretched away unto the edge of doom. I should not be withheld but that some day Into their vastness I should steal away, Fearless of ever finding open land, Or highway where the slow wheel pours the sand. I do not see why I should e'er turn back, Or those should not set forth upon my track To overtake me, who should miss me here And long to know if still I held them dear. They would not find me changed from him the knew-- Only more sure of all I though was true. ~~ Robert Frost
What you need to know about me!!! "I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it -- I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes. I own my past , my present and my future. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle people, and other aspects that I do not know -- but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me. However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If... later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded on my terms. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world, of people and things outside of me. I can choose what to wear, I can choose where to go when and if I want too and with whom. I know my faith and I know what I am all about. I owe nothing to noone except myself. I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay."
We go in and out of many doors in our life time. I say "we" but here I can only speak for myself. Sometimes I have walked in and out of the same door more than once or twice. Seems like I have had a hard time learning that when one door opens to another door closed...well, keeping on walking until I find the window. Hmm...that may sound familiar and if anyone knows...the lyrics are from one of my favorite songs. So, one can only imagine the first time I heard it...well, it hit hard and then came the thoughts that twisted around in my little mind that regardless of those doors whether they have been closed by someone else or closed by me alone there has to be something somewhere behind a door somewhere. Me, the rebellious trouble maker I once was...well, when the doors were shut or locked....I found a window can work just as good if not better.After a while, it seems I lost the courage to venture through another door...what for? I can recall still the sounds of the slamming of the doors. Some doors were slammed shut with force shattering the glass, while others were closed gently, with ease and with a subtle tug as I heard the door latch. To step away and look back feeling quite content to what I had done, to closing myself off completely and closing that specific door without regrets. Anxiously waiting.Regrets....hmmm... that’s something to think about. BUT! I emphasize...that though there are regrets I wouldn't change a thing....for doing so would only have changed the course of my life.Whether it had been a door or a window, regardless of where I’d be found I was there ...door open wide waiting.
Wonderment....
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Me and Mark April 21, 2011 I married Mark Smith!
My Girls .....Jessica and Erin after a cake fight.
Self control is the only real control that is always available to you. Your pains and injuries repeatedly confront you with the decision of whether you are going to be a victim or a survivor. Love is a gift; it can only be given, never earned. Today is perfectly suited for being who you always wanted to be. Not worrying is not the same as not caring. True unity doesn’t demand conformity. “Self esteem” and “good judgment” are different sides of the same coin. Loving someone doesn’t result in always enjoying them. Your competence will usually be gained by making many mistakes. Your autonomy and individuality will often be gained by having to accept the disapproval of some of the people you love
Some very powerful advice....Wow!!!! Seeing for myself how true this really is. Okay, I know this doesn't come as any big surprise, but it's worth mentioning anyway. It's also worth remembering next time your parents don't do the right thing or say the right thing or can't even figure out what the right thing is. Sometimes they blow it. They make mistakes. After all, they don't really know what they're doing. Professional parents just don't exist. Parents are on-the-job learners, and they frequently make mistakes. They probably won't admit this to you, but it's true. When you were born, you didn't come with an instruction manual. Sure, parenting books can help but not one of them contains information on how to parent you. That's because before you were born, no one like you ever existed on the face of the earth. God created you with your own blend of personality traits, gifts, talents, abilities, and special needs that nobody else ever had. And as every retired parent knows, what works with one child doesn't always work with another. So whether you were your parents' first child or their fifteenth, they still had to figure out how to parent you. And you know what? They're still at it. That's because as you get older, you continue to change. Every day your parents have to figure out how to be good parents for you based on who you are and who you're becoming. Some teenagers require more discipline and control, and others require less. Some need more love and attention while others need less. There's no science to this--it has to be done by trial and error. That's why parents sometimes make mistakes. I know I made my share of mistakes as a parent. I said no to my kids when I should have said yes. I said yes when I should have said no. I didn't listen to them when I should have, and I didn't talk to them when I should have. Sometimes I was too strict. Other times I was too lenient. The problem with being a parent is you really don't know what you're doing until after you've done it. Even then, it takes a few years to realize what you did wrong or did right. Don't hold your parents to a standard of perfection you can't even keep yourself. They do the best they can. You should realize that you have a lot to do with how successful your parents are. You can help them not make so many mistakes. If you can make life easier for them, there's a pretty good chance life will be easier for you. As I said earlier, parents generally learn how to parent from their kids. Parents with problem kids seem to be problem parents. Parents with good kids seem to be good parents. See, you have a lot more power to impact your family than you may realize. Parents aren't perfect, of course. They won't always do the right thing. Your parents may disappoint you from time to time, and you'll wonder why they can't be more consistent, more reasonable, more trustworthy, or more like the parents of somebody else you know. But parent envy only makes things worse. Your parents are human, and they're probably the only parents you'll ever get. In their own inept way, they're doing the best they can. They need your understanding, forgiveness, cooperation, and love--in spite of all their mistakes
"If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies."
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